Am I stimulated enough?

My balcony-facing room has its door wide open. I have fixed my table closer to its threshold, so that I can face this vast world. The sunlight falls across my desk weaving a dancing pattern of light and shadow. I sit with a sense of purpose almost like a sailor at the helm of her ship as I become ready to navigate the unknown.

Every time my focus gets intensified at my desk, with the clicking of my keyboard or as I read an intriguing phrase, I get to make a connection with this world. It is the tangible manifestation of my co-existence with this world running in parallel. Yet, it is only when I peer at the world through this peephole-like door, that I can truly feel that I am a part of it.

It is neither mere fascination nor another attempt to feel a part of something larger. In my opinion, it is the acceptance of my being without a self focused mentality. It gives me the downpour of profoundness amidst the unavoidable drizzle of insignificance.

Whether it is a lone walk to a cafe, a trip to the grocery shop with my partner or a friendly hang out- I gain this sense of belonging to others and vice versa. But unless I have walked barefoot on the grass, smelled the earthy scent of the soil and leaves, or laid down on my terrace, baking under the sun - I don’t get the feeling that I belong to this world. It is these experiences that forge my camaraderie with nature, despite my solitude.

To be continued...